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just thinking loud again
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
When love finds its way
Just when you told yourself that you’ll never trust anyone again, you find someone who’d change how you see things. I like it that I didn’t expect it to happen. God really knows how to surprise me. Before this, I have always questioned why my decisions lead me to things that really don’t make sense to me. Now I know. Now they make a lot of sense.
It is funny how the person I’ve been waiting for is a combination of the personalities of the people I have dated in the past. No compromises and not a lot of effort on this one. It is just right for me. And for the first time, I don’t feel guilty that this person is quite perfect for me. For the first time, I know that I deserve to be happy with this person.
I know it’s only perfect until we get to the first fight. I would like to think that I am wiser in handling this by now. I would like to think that the person I’m with knows how to make me feel okay when we fight. That it is not the end and fights are normal to couples. I don’t want to pre-empt anything but I feel that this person can handle my mood swings.
In any of my relationships, I have always feared my friends’ reaction to the person I am with. Not that it has always bothered me but it has always been difficult for me to balance my time and attention between my friends and my mate. It is really comforting that I know my friends will not object to this relationship.
My parents never ask me about whom I am dating and they just hear about them when it is over. I haven’t really told anyone in my family but I know that they know I’ve waited so long to be happy. I am over the fact that my family is not perfect. I don’t think it is right to blame my parents for my bad relationships. I made the bad decisions, I made the wrong choices.
And who would’ve thought that love and work will coexist in my life? This just proves that the right person always comes in the right time. Time is not even an issue. When you know that you have a lifetime to spend together, you don’t have to be together every minute of the day.
I don’t know where this is going but I know where we both want it to go.